Long Lost Relatives Nearly Long Lost in Long Grass at Mayor's Mansion

The Mayor's sister-in-law is getting married in a little over a month and the wedding shower was at the Mayor's Mansion over the weekend. Much to my chagrin, the weather conspired against me yet again and I was unable to get the grass cut before the event. I would not have been surprised if guests could not find the house due to the jungle growing outside.

This has been the case for nearly every weekend this season since the grass started growing. (The other two "nice" weekends were spent at funerals.)

For the past couple weekends, I've been watching it rain or freeze while I drank my coffee on the couch each morning, contemplating this humiliation. As a guy, nothing can be more important in making impressions at these events than your yard. We don't make the cake, we don't plan the event, we don't write down who gave what, and we CERTAINLY don't write the 'thank you' notes. Thanks again, Mother Nature for making me look like a total failure. Your power even usurps the Mayor's. I can only hope my neighbors, who appear to have cut their grass somehow, don't try to oust me.